The ideal Job

Hmmm...I was recently asked to email a resume with a description of my ideal job in my field. I will post some thought here first, because I know no one reads this and knowing me, I would probably delete a local version of a diary in a fit of frustration, anyway.

What would my ideal job be in video/media/art/?
(a list of various facets)

• I would need autonomy. LOTS of it. Basically, as much autonomy as is given (which is a wierd way to think about it: given, as though it is a privilege to work free from restrictions...) to a Nobel Prize winning author, or Howard Stern. He seems to have a hell of a lot of autonomy. The little that he does have to kowtow to someone else, he bitches about it on his show, which is almost better in a lot of ways.
  
• Also, a decent wage is important, say $30.00/hour. which is really not that much, considering what a lot of people make doing brainless repetitive Brazilesque tasks. 60k a year.
  
• Creative!!!!!!! Fun!!!!! Technical!!!!!! Intellectual!!!!! Abstract!!!!!! Advertising!!!!!! (....)
• Project-oriented. monotony is deadly. Similar tasks are fine, but the same drudging, keeping the machine (business) alive with a series of repetitive tasks which are the basis of the machine's existence sucks. Projected oriented because it confers a large degree of novelty. What is the next thing to do? How can this be done in a refreshing way?
• Excellence. Top quality product. As good at what it does as is possible. Which is basically saying that Excellence implies integrity, authority, conviction, and confidence. Important because a lot of people are willing to continue to pay for excellent things.
• Social. Obviously, the best of human endeavor is accomplished cooperatively, not competitively. As corny as it sounds, and believe me, there is no cornier word today, but synergy is, in essence, divine assistance. A hierarchy which is one part Lord of the Flies and 3 parts Gilligan's Island.
  

New video effect discovered in camera. It will yield results like the above. Working on new video and will see where it goes with more pics later.
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And the despair continues...

So the deal is I am not in the mood nor have the energy to push on today. I should check horoscope and see what is going on upstairs. The main thing is overwhelm. Nothing seems at all satisfying right now, not food, not art, not sex, not smoking, not video editing, not being in CoH, not masturbation, not friends, not drugs nothing. I am feeling that the next couple of weeks are going to be trying as I try and prepare for the last year at SFAI. My hope is that I get accepted to Stanford's MFA program in Art Practice, however I realize I have a lot of work to do in the meantime. I want that sense of control that seems to come when I am in the groove of things.