Teeth

I am sitting at the Berkeley Free Clinic. In about a half an hour a dentist will give me check up. I am still dealing with the surgical site post-op effects a year later. I need several fillings a few RCTs and a crown or three.
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
I let this blog slip away, due in large part to how divulgent I've become about personal matters and the criticism I have experienced or internalized or both.






Anyway-
What's new?
Living in Oakland. Most of the day I spend consumed in all things Internet. WoW (it is important to capitalize the second W) has been my preferred reality if that can even be said. Pot consumption, porn usage, isolation and caffeine in-take are up, social engagement, human contact, mobility and sleep are down.
A year ago...what was I doing this time last year...?
Rancho, roadtrip, Isla Vista, healing from mouth surgery, truck sold and gone, friends around me everyday, haunted thoughts about J and V and all the tired old pasts that I seem to be chewing on (even now) and coming to peace within myself, in spite of massive disappointment and remorse.

So, as much as I want to be happy, to feel free, as much as I want to be in love with Life, with the truth of all truths- everything changes- the truth is hard and uncomprimising as often as it is beautiful and real.
- posted by J